Even the Joyful Heart Is Restless
3rd Sunday of Advent
Saint Augustine begins his spiritual autobiography, the Confessions, with the following prayer: “Great are you, O Lord, and greatly to be praised; great is your power, and of your wisdom there is no end. And man, being a part of your creation, desires to praise you — man, who bears about with him his mortality, the witness of his sin [….] — yet man, this part of your creation, desires to praise you. You move us to delight in praising you; for you have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.”[1] Augustine’s restless heart has spoken to many as it has spoken to mine. Augustine articulates so clearly the constant itch of our human condition for more and for better. Augustine reminds us that the heart made by God can only rest in God, and until it does it will never be satisfied.
Many people have found Augustine’s insight pivotal in turning away from sin. Sin catches our attention and draws our will by the proposition of offering us some good, but instead of receiving it, we are only ever left empty-handed and frustrated. We should, then, turn away from sin and only seek after God, who is goodness itself and who alone can give rest to our restless heart.
At this point, this homily is about to become a choose-your-own adventure. If today you find yourself knee-deep in sin and need Augustine’s prayer to turn your life around, then I invite you for the next five minutes to tune me out and pray for the Lord to finish what he’s begun in you. Consider the vanity of sin, how fleeting are its promises, and ask God for the grace to allow you to leave it behind and choose only for him. But if you have already made some big life conversions and find yourself today only ankle-deep, or toes-deep, grappling with tedious every-day sins, then come with me to think about Augustine’s restless heart at a deeper level.
I’m speaking primarily to this second group because, chances are, when you put ‘big sin’ in your past, you probably expected more out of what God had in store for you. You may have felt at the moment of your conversion tremendous peace and joy but were then disheartened when those feelings left. You perhaps expected that restless heart of yours to come, at last, to the rest you were promised and yet it’s still searching, grasping, wanting for more and better. You may have found yourself asking whether leaving sin behind was even worth it, as those who haven’t, by all appearances, seem at least just as unsatisfied as you. So, in place of the peace and joy you once felt, perhaps there is bitterness, resentment, and a begrudging perseverance in what God wants of you.
The Church today celebrates the Third Sunday of Advent in which the focus is on joy. Paul tells us to “Rejoice always.” But I must ask, of you and of myself: is anyone here actually joyful? Paul thinks we should be joyful always, but for most of us joy tends to depend on the day or even the hour. Joy comes and it goes, with us at one moment and leaving us behind in the next. So, what are we to make of the joy that we sometimes experience? Is it really worth the hassle of living the Christian life to attain it? Or would we do just as well to leave Christ and the Gospel behind and return to our former way of living?
These are weighty questions, but the answer is right before us. Augustine begins his Confessions by reminding us that, though we desire to praise God eternally, we still exist in time, we “who [bear] about with [us our] mortality, the witness of [our] sin.” The rest of which Augustine speaks is only found in God, but it is only found when we will be with God, not in time, but in eternity. While we are in time, what God gives us — even the good things! — possess a transitory character. They are meant not as ends in themselves but as means to our final end, the purpose and goal of why we were created: eternal life in heaven with God. So, joy, peace, hope, patience, love, and every other grace that God gives us now — gifts in which we delight — will not stay with us, and we should not expect them to. Instead, we should allow them to push us forward, closer to attaining the gifts of God which are eternal. Saint Thomas Aquinas, who himself was deeply indebted to Saint Augustine, said this of joy: “[J]oy is full when there remains nothing to be desired. But as long as we are in this world, the movement of desire does not cease in us, because it still remains possible for us to approach nearer God by grace […] When once, however, perfect happiness has been attained, nothing will remain to be desired, because then there will be full enjoyment of God.”[2]
There is an analogy here with the sacraments. Sacraments are visible signs that point beyond themselves to a higher, invisible reality. The sacrament, the sign, is just the necessary bridge that gets us from A to B, from this world to God; but in heaven, there will be no sacraments, since we will see God face to face and any bridge will be unnecessary. So, all of the graces God gives us in this life are sacramental — perceptible, transitory signs that point beyond themselves toward eternal realities that are promised to us. The upside of the Christian life is not only that it makes our earthly living better and more fulfilling — and, though sometimes it may be difficult to see, it most certainly does — but that it brings us to that place for which our hearts long and wherein alone they will find rest. That should be all the reason we need for sticking it out. We can think about the graces God gives like John the Baptist: “He was not the light, but came to testify to the light.” John points beyond himself to Christ, and the joy we experience at this moment or that points beyond itself to the joy that is everlasting. The graces of time testify to the ones of eternity.
I believe the simple knowledge that we are on the way, even if the way is not without its trials, should be enough to make us joyful, even if we remain restless. God has created us for himself, and he will not cease to be faithful to his promise to fulfill our heart’s deepest desire to praise him forever. Let our soul, this day, rejoice in the Lord, for “this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus” and “[t]he one who calls you is faithful, and he will also accomplish” what he has promised.
“Great are you, O Lord, and greatly to be praised […] And man, being a part of your creation, desires to praise you […] You move us to delight in praising you; for you have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.”
Homily preached December 16/17, 2023 at the Cathedral of Mary Our Queen and St. Thomas Aquinas, Hampden.
[1] Augustine, Confessions, I.1.
[2] Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologiae II-II q. 28, a. 3.